Interim Sponsorship Coordinators (Find a Sponsor | Be a Sponsor)
In SCA New York, some meetings have interim sponsorship coordinators who facilitate connections between potential sponsors and sponsees who regularly attend our meetings.
A newcomer is defined as anyone within their first 90 days in program. It is recommended that newcomers have an interim sponsor for their first 30 days in program. It is very helpful during this period to have a person who can answer questions, give guidance and help develop a sexual recovery plan.
An interim sponsor is someone who has a minimum of 90 days on their sexual recovery plan, and who is willing to share their experience of recovery with a beginner on a continuous, individual basis for a 30-day period.
Please see "Suggested Guidelines for Sponsorship" (below the sign-up form) for more information on the service of being a sponsor.
Suggested Guidelines for Sponsorship
SCA requires that an Interim Sponsor to have a minimum of three months of sobriety on a plan. Thus, length of sobriety is a factor, but not the only factor, in successful sponsorship. The sponsor should also have capacity for understanding, patience, and the willingness to devote time and effort to new members.
It is suggested that Interim Sponsor might:
Encourage the newcomer to attend a variety of meetings, to get a broad view of the program.
Highlight the fact that it is the SCA recovery program, not the sponsor that is important. Thus, the newcomer learns to rely more on the SCA program than the sponsor.
Introduce the newcomer to other members, when possible.
Introduce the newcomer to SCA literature.
Help the newcomer draft a sexual recovery plan.
Quickly admit, “I don’t know” when that is the case, and helps the newcomer to find a good source of information.
Never tries to impose personal views on the newcomer. For example, a good sponsor who is an atheist does not try to persuade a religious newcomer to abandon faith, nor does a religious sponsor argue theological matters with an agnostic newcomer.
An Interim Sponsor works within the limits of their personal experience and knowledge, to help the newcomer for the 30 days. The main goal is for the sponsee to be introduced to some of the tools we use to get sober and stay sober through the SCA program.
It is especially important for both Interim Sponsor and Sponsee to keep the words of the SCA Closing Statement in mind: “In the spirit of recovery from sexual compulsion, we suggest that sex between members not be treated lightly. Sex between people new to the fellowship and other members is discouraged.”
When two people agree to interim sponsorship, they may want to meet in a public place initially. This can be thought of as an interview. It is an opportunity to get to know each other. We share our stories, and begin to establish boundaries. The sponsee could have questions prepared ahead of time:
Will there be assignments, or suggestions?
How often do we meet in person?
What methods of communication are appropriate: telephone calls, email, or texts?
Who calls whom, how often, and how soon is contact expected to be returned?
Upon answering a call, a sponsor can say things like “I have five minutes to talk,” or “Can I call you back in half an hour?” or “I cannot talk now.” They each disclose times that it are acceptable or not acceptable to call. They can say whether it is permissible to leave messages or not, and if there are any limitations on the kinds of messages that can be left.
If an Interim Sponsee’s ideas sound strange or unclear, it is up to the Sponsor to ask questions. This should be an easy, open relationship, in which both parties talk freely and honestly with each other. If things don’t work out with the Interim Sponsee, feel free to contact us again. If, at anytime you feel you can work with another Interim Sponsee, please let us know.